Nearly famous

I googled my name the other day and discovered I am Russian born, a vocalist/pianist/songwriter with a number of noteworthy music awards to my name. My photo reveals that I am quite attractive - a youngish blonde with sultry good looks.

I also found my name on cemetery lists and family trees. It appears I expired in 1872, in 1908 and again in 1933 and was dearly missed after having lived a lifetime as somebody's daughter, wife or mother.

Honestly? The only thing i share in common with these people is my name.

So just who am I?

It's hard to say.

I have lived too long and too well to fit neatly into a single adjective or sentence. And still after so many years, the quintessential me is still emerging. Just when I think I have arrived, I find I have merely reached one of the many milestones in my life. In my humble opinion, my life is as ordinary as my looks and my achievements less than average. I know I have just described a large majority of the human population but do you know what ? I have yet to come across another me!

Like many people, I am still in the process of self-discovery - God's work in progress. Like an onion, I have shed many layers of self in agitation and tears. Knowing I am unconditionally loved by God has helped to ease much of the discomfort that comes with that painful process. In spite of all that I have been through, I can still say I have no regrets for choosing the straight and narrow path of walking with Jesus.

As simple and straightforward as I am, I find I am still somewhat an enigma of sorts to many people. Lately, I have had to accept that even the closest of friends haven't figured me out! So it looks like only God understands me and loves me as I am. Perhaps this is best...

I have tried to borrow words that may help to explain the person I have become.

Passionate - Because I have to connect emotionally with whatever or whoever I know.

Average - and proud of it!

Unequivocal - Its important to me that people say what they mean and mean what they say and I try hard to keep to that ideal. I really hate it when words are manipulated to use people or for personal gain.Curse words don't seem to have half the effect on me as untrue and flippant words do.

Love to Eat - What can I say? I can't apologize for being Malaysian! My friend calls me the Yellow pages when it comes to finding good food!I love to see people try my favourite foods and I love discovering new tastes too.

Inventive - Although I am a creature of habit, I do look for ways to break the monotony of routine and predictability. I must admit though, at times, I don't really look hard enough!I am such a couch potato, I can sit and watch the same movie even if I've seen it umpteen times!

Non-competitive - I dislike competition for a couple of reasons. It means someone has to lose. I hate that. Plus it's unnerving to be viewed as rival who must be eliminated. Having said that I am overcome with joy even a bit teary eyed at seeing someone win after they've worked so hard for it!

Teacher - I think the one quality that qualifies me to teach others is teachability! I am a little stupid, so when I make a discovery, I get all excited about it and I need to share! Consequently, I believe teaching is the process of aiding discovery! (I didn't come up with that one btw. Remember I'm just average!)

Humour - even this seemingly ordinary trait makes me different from others. Cause I love to laugh with people, not at them.

Genuinely happy for others - Strange but I must say, I can't remember being jealous and envious of others. I am genuinely happy for other people, my more successful siblings and friends. I have been overtaken many times in the race for success, recognition and reward but it does not seem to bother me. I guess the credit has to go to God. He's made me content with who I am and confident of the destiny He has for me.

Well, that's just a little bit about me.

I doubt all this would fit onto my tombstone so I have written it here!

Do life!

I’ve been wondering why we hide out in church so much when Jesus neither preached or practiced that. Somehow, we have made our faith a cozy cave to escape to; and for others it's an exclusive club to belong to. We busy ourselves with programs and events that keep us hedged in and the 'unchurched' hedged out. We've created a subculture called Christianity, just like the Pharisees made out of Judaism. Church members IN, Non-church members OUT. Believers faithfully flock to Sunday services for their weekly fix of spiritual food and fellowship. But they are believers not in Christ, but in a religion that's been conveniently packaged for the conscientious religious consumer.

Jesus taught in synagogues sometimes– the official approved centers for teaching and learning the Word of God though he did not keep the sabbath as often as the religious Pharisees did. He usually sat out in the open where the common folk gathered, like at the mountain side, where little boys picnicked on lunches their mothers had packed for them. By the beach where fishermen washed and mended their nets, at the roadside where blind men begged. Out in the open, where lazy sheep grazed on green meadows and farmers sowed their seed on carefully tilled ground. He attended weddings, funerals and parties. He rubbed shoulders with ordinary people. He ate and drank with ‘sinners’ while the Pharisees fasted and observed their religious traditions with their own kind. He didn't speak as the Pharisees did with their clever and eloquent theology but told stories that all adults and children could understand. He was truly a man of the people. A simple carpenter who worked with his hands, loved God and genuinely cared for those around him.

And guess what? The people who believed his message were not the learned and intellectual minds. It was the prostitute, the not so honest tax-collectors, the blind, the crippled, the demon possessed, the pagan centurion, the poor fishermen etc. These could not find fault with him. They saw how genuine and real he was and how that starkly contrasted with the Pharisees. The religious community didn't like him but that's okay because he didn't like them either. He exposed their false morality and self-righteous ways at every opportunity. He didn't even try to work out his differences with them but promptly denounced them as children of the devil! You had to hand it to him. Jesus didn't do 'church'. He didn't do 'cell group'. He did LIFE!

So why are you still cooped up in there?

Get out and start living life!

Speechless

I took a silly "Which bible book are you?" quiz on facebook and answered inane questions like what kind of curtains I like and how I would pass an hour of free time and what is the first thing I do when I wake up (which is brush my teeth!) . And this was the result of my honest answers...

EXODUS - Passionate about justice, you can't be at peace until you've done your best to help the oppressed. You are not afraid to speak truth to power, though you've paid the price for doing so. You will sacrifice for the good of others; you're a true servant-leader. You do not rely on your own power. You don't have to. You've seen Providence step in to change what looked like disaster into victory. At the same time, you've suffered and been lonely as a result of your refusal to go along with the crowd. You know that the great plan is beyond our limited comprehension, and what looks like a loss to you may eventually turn out to be a win.

I was speechless.